Fuck you!
That’s what he said to me.
I am silenced by my disbelief.
He formed his mouth to deceive me with ‘I love you’
Now he says some shit like that to me?
And despite my hurt
Despite my rules, I forgave.See that the problem with compromise
Is once you let that shit slide
When it all falls down, it’s a knife in your pride!
Teary eyed
Like ‘I never…been so disrespected, whether
Or not you were mad
You didn’t have to do me like that!
But blinded by the infatuation of chemistry
I let that shit slide
Now the line in the sand has been crossed.
I am now void and lost.
Cause the things I would never do
Have become true.
And like puppet strings he begins to control too.
He loans me his morality
So now it’s my reality.
Living a life of fallacies
While he create this fantasy
That ‘FUCK YOU!’ is a normality
And then, I will accept it.
When he says ‘fuck you’ again
I won’t flinch
What he is saying is my common.
Freely living in his world, on his atlas
I shall spiral out of control
While his words mentally taking a toll;
Slowly damaging my soul.
A web of curses and untruths
That I don’t dispute
Because the real me is on mute
All over a ‘fuck you’
Words hold power
They hold weight
And the one that said they loved me
Cursed you with hate
But since love is a drug
I become numb, let it go with a shrug
When you don’t address shit
You accept it
This sea of confusion consumes me
Molds me to doom me.
My perfectly packaged box of boundaries no longer exist
It came with a fee
My dignity
‘Fuck you’ turns into bitch
Bitch turns into ‘you ain’t shit’
Whatever is in the mind manifest physically.
I drift further away from my spirituality.
No longer in tune with me.
Joy replace gloom.
So disconnected.
I become indecisive
Never trying shit
Down for whatever.
Always empty
No ones home.
Now I begin to phone…in emotions
Never knowing what I want
Which trickles into my life
Infecting every area of my life.
Door-matted, Because I let shit slide.
Cursed out because I compromised
Disrespected cause I broke my rules
All over some bullshit ‘ Fuck You’
